Single.

And i plan on staying that way. Last night, God spoke to me through Mike Witt's message and convicted me of a few things in my life. I've been single ever since September and keep looking at guys thinking about potentially dating them. Which is so distracting! i mean, I don't really know why i've been manhunting, all i know is that it makes me very self-conscious and distracts me from my other relationships. I feel like God was telling me last night that as His child, I need to not only love Him, but also to trust Him. I have to start letting go and letting Him all aspects of my life, not only the parts that I hand over to Him. Because of this, I have decided to stop waiting to live my life until I have the right man in it. I have decided not to let my single-ness define me. Mainly, I have decided to stop looking at guys like a piece of meat that i can't wait to taste, but rather as plain people. This doesn't mean that I won't slip up from time to time, but I just need to stop expecting a guy to pop into my life right now. God is in control of what's going to happen in my life and I just need to trust Him to do what He's going to do and not rush things. I told Brendon last night that i'm no longer interested in him as anything more tha a friend, but hopefully, a good one.

But the point is I'm not looking. If God wants me to be single for a while, I have to accept that that is His plan and not try to interfere with it. He knows who the right man for me is and He knows exactly when and how He's going to put him into my life. I just have to trust Him that He knows what He is doing. It's going to be hard, but I know it's for my own good and He's only going to use it to make me stronger.

I don't need a man to complete me. God will provide me with a partner to share this life with as long as I trust Him. So no more stressing out over boys, it's not allowed.